Five months of 2023 are gone with seven to go. One may wonder–quite reasonably–where has the time gone? What have they accomplished thus far, and what’s to come? The year is almost half gone, so what is there to show for it? Only you can answer for yourself (and only YOU can prevent forest fires). In my case, it’s the usual, which is more than nothing, but it’s less than I’d like. Reflection can be good up to point (not great if you’re a vampire looking into a mirror). Action is what propels us forward. Into what, though? The breach? Good trouble, or the other kind? We can hope for the former, be realistic, and remain vigilant that bad luck may find us despite our best efforts to avoid it. We humans try to keep reevaluating and chipping away at our goals. But sometimes will power isn’t enough. Spoiler alert:  I don’t have all the answers, but I think it has something to do with doing your best.

Cycling:  Strava the activity application says I was 18 miles shy of my 455-mile per month goal. That’s not too bad considering for a good two weeks I had some bug then the aftereffects. It sapped my energy (more than it already is). Add in my age (as high as it’s ever been, strangely enough), weight as a fathlete, and general low level of rest, I did what I could to take it easy, even though I was on a job. I probably caught the nasty thing there, actually.

The 2023 Ride of Silence, which I wrote about, was a highlight in mid-May, even if it was for a somber purpose. (Remembering those cyclists who are no longer here due to car crashes.) Still, I averaged 14 miles a day, 98 miles a week, and I didn’t get a ticket, hurt or dead. There were two weeks with some sort of illness (no, not THAT one) that slowed me down on top of all my usual ailments. Now it’s June, and I’ll try to do better, hoping I’m feeling better. What else is there?

Walking:  I’m slow, but hey, I always go. About 1.2 miles a day in a half hour. Ideally, I get out there in the mornings to take advantage of the natural boost of melatonin, but often later because I get sucked into tasks. Occasionally, I walk after the heat of the day has dissipated some. And heat time is definitely upon us, June 1 being the official start of meteorological summer. One bonus of walking in my once and current neighborhood is that sometimes you see nice people and interesting things like yard art. For example, a pack of half a dozen bicycle cops–state troopers–waved at me. Better than waving a gun. I see no reason to quit this practice. I suppose I could maybe speed it up, but nah, it’s hot.

Yoga:  This Xmas will mark 10 years of daily practice, so I’ll be damned if anything short of mortal injury, death, or unconsciousness stops me. I admit to being in a bit of a rut with my practice. I’m doing it late in the day, so it’s not vigorous at all. Which is fine, because gentle yoga is good for working out the kinks from cycling. But since I use the Insight Meditation Timer on my “self own”, I mean cell phone, it’s too easy while holding a pose to “just look up something quick” and then to go down a rabbit hole. I need to cut that distraction out. Yoga should be something to help me wind down, but it can be like a second wind and keep me up. I should try it in the morning, or at least earlier in the day.  Old habits die hard.

Foam Rolling:  I’ve been adding this habit for five minutes at the end or beginning of my yoga for quite some time. Last week I missed six days thanks to forgetting to take the roll along for a visit to relatives. It felt odd to not do it, but c’est la vie. I am back at it though, and it is helpful for sure.

Reading:  I still do this daily for half an hour or more. I’m finishing the second of two older books by Stephen King, Eyes of the Dragon and The Dark Half, and starting two John Grisham books, The Boys From Biloxi and Calico Joe. I still aim to branch out into other writers, particularly memoirists. For now, I’m just enjoying the page-turning stories, plotting, characters, setting, and overall feeling of reading these two American masters.

Writing:  Every day I work on revising my book, and most days I journal. Except when I blog. Most weeks I meet with a small critique group, which keeps me honest and looking for things to cut. “Kill your darlings,” as the advice goes. But it seems like I have TWO books:  a book about how to ride your bicycle a far piece when your fifty and flabulous, and a tale of my life growing up. The goal was to write a book, and I did that. Publishing is another beast, We shall see if either work ever makes it to the editorial stage, which costs big bucks or a lot of luck finding an agent and publishing house.

Music: I practice my instrument for 15 minutes a day, and often I stink. But it’s good for the brain and soul (if there is one, and I have one). And fun or at least gratifying. So I continue.

Food: I’m on the same eating regimen–no grain flours (e.g. whole grain), amd mostly a Mediterranean regimen, but with no visible progress. Lately the number on the scale has been going the wrong direction, for reasons unknown. But I persist. Because if you give me one cookie, piece of cake, slice of bread, tortilla, etc. and I’ll want all the cookies, etc. I still have a daily salad, too. Although I missed one recently the world didn’t end.

Things I’m not doing: Swimming, lifting weights or using resistance bands because, tired, sleeping long or well enough (my brain needs a nap most days) , working a straight 8-5 job (I blame the previous item), or making tons of money being self- employed, cleaning out the garage, and probably many other things I “should” be doimg. I’m doing five hours of activities every day, and most days that’s probably too much.

Will power is like a muscle and becomes fatigued. To nurture it I suppose you’d tell me to stop all my streaks and rest. Except then I’d be afraid I might not keep going. In the end, you do your best and forget the rest. Or maybe get a coach. Take a break or at least simmer down, use a home trainer, or whatever. The gurus say we should find a way to do what gives you meaning, purpose, joy, and so on, if you can afford to. Many people can’t. But also the brain, body, or life, get in the way of goals. Will power doesn’t work. So try easing up on yourself. Too tired and can only bike 7.5 miles today? So be it. There’s tomorrow, hopefully. And there are more important things in life than hitting (or missing) milestones.

Still, I know I would sure like to know, “Why don’t I do the right thing?” Maybe brain drain from doing all the above. Chemistry. Bad habits to offset the good. But here’s the thing: success is measured in PROGRESS, not some abstract number. If you’re at least doing something and moving toward your goals, you’re doing better than the old you, and many other people, too. Don’t discount all your efforts! Celebrate them. Meanwhile, when I figure out why will power alone isn’t enough, I’ll let you know. Til then, I’ll try to take care of me, and you try to take care of you.

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