Death comes as the end of all living beings, be they mammalian, amphibian, reptilian, and avian. To paraphrase a 1972 song that recently got stuck in my head by the band The Main Ingredient, “Everybody plays the ghoul, there’s no exception to the rule.” As my brother says, “Nobody gets out alive.” In this cheery and uplifting post, A Dude Abikes (c’est moi!) shares a few thoughts and a dozen pointers on how people on bikes can remain among the land of the living.
As the subspecies of Homo sapiens who propel themselves around on two-wheeled machines, bicyclists are certainly vulnerable road users and thus susceptible to death by car crash. “In 2021 there were 966 pedalcyclist fatalities, accounting for 2.2 percent of all traffic fatalities that year,” (in the USA). That’s 966 too many, but relatively encouragiing considering the 42,939 people who died total by car crash which includes pedestrians. Another stat says 20% of the cyclists in crashes with cars were drunk. Also, “In 2021 an estimated 41,615 pedalcyclists were injured.” This is according to the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration. However, bicycling is still generally safe if you follow the rules and ride defensively.
So, what does one do to steer clear of the Grim Reaper, to avoid getting into that irreversible and proverbial pickle with that old black-clad creeper with the sickle? These tips are probably not news to most of you who are hard core cyclists, but they bear repeating. These tips are probably not news to most of you who are hard core cyclists, but they bears repeating. (Those two sentences were brought to you by Monty Python’s Department of Redundancy Department. Well, really just the second one, if you want to be precise. And where did the talking bear come from? What’s their story?)
- Know thyself. If you think you’re faster than that car barrelling down the road toward you, and you’re not, you’ll learn this lesson quickly. Be aware of your strengths and weaknesses, and ride within them. If you’re not sure, don’t risk it.
- Be visible. During the day you are more likely to be seen, but there’s also more traffic. At night can be fine with good lights, a safety vest, and brightly colored clothes are all great ways to remain among the not dead (yet), in the land of the living crowd. A very bright headlight that is flashing even during the day can really help you to stand out. Conversely, avoiding all of those things are a good way to get deaded quickly.
- Never trust car drivers to follow the law. Tonight on my daily ride, an idiot was driving a Jeep IN THE PROTECTED BIKE LANE HEAD ON! This happened as I approached an intersection, trying to enter the two-way bike lane HE HAD COMPLETLY BLOCKED. This was with a car right in front of me. Even if they signal or wave you on, watch them like hawks until they pass or you know you’re safe.
- Follow the law. There are plenty of cyclists who flaunt the rules. We’ve all half-stopped or rolled through four-way stop signs when no cars are around. But FFS, don’t go darting across red lights, rie in the opposite direction, fail to signal, and so on because you could die. Be predictable and act like the vehicle you are.
- Wear a helmet. Yes, they’re not perfect, they mess up your hair, and look silly. Try watching this crash test dummy (head only) video on YouTube by Chris Rollins on YouTube. The slow-motion in particular shows the graphic impact of a head hitting the road at 55 mph with a helmet (granted, it’s a motorcycle helmet) versus one without protection. Then go immediately to buy a helmet and wear it 100% of the time you’re bicycling. I once crashed on a shitty sidewalk and hit my helmet, not my head. That’s why I’m here and not dead. Here’s my post titled New Bicycle Helmet Poem, which has a link to a more serious post, Helmet Schelmet: Should You Wear a Brain Bucket on a Bicycle?.
- Plot your route. Ask your local bicycle shop, other bike riders, or even find your city’s bike map if they have one. But when going somewhere new (which is not often, since I’ve been in Austin about 27 years total), I pull up Google Maps, select the Bicycle option to highlight the green or dotted-green paths. These are usually safer ways to go. Usually; you can verify this yourself by looking at the street view to see if there’s a bike lane, a debris-filled narrow shoulder, sidewalk, or nothing. If it’s a commute, and you have a car, you could drive first to find the best way.
- Ride only on trails, sidewalks, and side roads. Depending where you live, you might be able to find shortcuts that take you away from major streets. I often ride sidewalks, especially when there are no bike lanes and traffic is screaming by at 50 miles per hour. Just check your municipality for where it’s legal; in most places, it is fine. Of course you have to pay extra attentiion to vehicles coming out of parking lots, especially if you are goiing against traffic; cars definitely are not looking for you. Then there are curbs, gaps, pedestrians, etc. Trails are great if they go where you want to. Streets are likely inevitable though at some point.
- Be willing to go off the beaten path. Some places are more bicycle-friendly than others, so be prepared for some dirt, mud, grass, and the like. Recently, on a ride in the ‘burbs of a certain large Texas city, I had to do some rough riding in the dirt. Although it could be anywhere, including Austin, it is more common for that area for a sidewalk to simply end. The alternative was biking on the service road of a tollway, so I chose life and stayed away from Death Race 2023 by going slowly over the uneven udeveloped earth.
- ABC — Always Be Checking. Keep your head on a swivel. Look as much ahead, to the sides, and behind you with peripheral vision. Some people opt for rear-view mirrors.
- Eliminate distractions. Never use headphones (bone conduction might be an exception, but still, I don’t), talk on your cell phone, or blast your Bluetooth speaker. These are no-brainers, which your head will bee if you do them and don’t see hear the silent electric vehiclee behind you with a distracted driver as they smash into your clueless body.
- Get an electric bike. I don’t use one (yet) or go out of my way to advocate for them, because it feels like cheating. I call them motorcycles, which they are, technically. And, although I’m a fathlete, I’m trying to not get fatter, so I need the exercise. However, they are less polluting than cars, so I’m not opposed to them whee operated safely. They are risky when ridden by inexperienced riders. But if you can handle them, they will give you extra power going uphill or to get out of the way of cars.
- Ride in a pack. Group rides are generally better especially on rural roads because there is safety in numbers. Unless you get some jackass who plows into your peloton. Vehicles generally will get the point and wait until it’s safe to go around you.
- BONUS: Don’t ride at all. This one makes no sense to me, because not bicycling does not compute. And, no risk, no reward. Not bicycling guarantees you won’t die by riding a bicycle. But if you get around some other way than by bike, those aren’t risk-free either. You could also include riding exclusively on a trainer with this point, because you’re not really riding. However, you could die on on a trainer, especially the kind with rollers, or from a heart attack, or sheer boredom.
I thought about including those newfangled air bags that iniflate from your helmet when it senses a crash, but it’s a product that’s not widely available yet, is expensive, and it won’t keep the rest of your body from being mangled in a crash.
Well, there you have it: a baker’s dozen ways to stay alive on your bicycle. Which is your favorite? What would you add to the list?
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